Coffee High

I've probably consumed more coffee in the last 24 hours than i have in the last 10 years combined.  Man, that stuff is bad!! I feel good, I feel happy.  Its funny how clarity can just descend on you in such a way that you have a hard time believing its real.  That after everything, that somethings can be so easy.  That in one moment, in one breath, I can be completely safe and happy, and KNOW it will last.  No fear, no reservations.  all trust, and excitement for the good that is to come.

Bueller? Bueller?

In honor of finally realizing one of my longest held prepubscent dreams, meeting Ferris Bueller (cough) I mean Matthew Broderick in the flesh, I present: 

I'm out

I'm out of my funk.  I am happy. Downright giddy.  Everything is going right.  I was thinking today I am a lucky girl.  I am not.  I am blessed. With a son, family and friends.  With health.  With intelligence.  Most of the rest beyond that isn't luck.  I am making it happen.  Things aren't just happening to me.  I have taken the reins, and I am directing my caravan.  I am making my own luck, and it feels good. 

Breathe

Why do I hurt so much?  This shouldn't hurt so much.  I know with every fiber in me that I have made the best decision of my life.  But I am afraid of the unknown, of the vast uncharted territory ahead of me.  Deep breaths. Long slow deep breaths.    The air fills my lungs, and I can feel the calm course through my veins.  At least for a moment.  A fleeting moment of relief.  Just keep breathing.  String these moments together til I get through. 

Ancient Journal

So, I am going through my books, discarding the rejects and packing the keepers, and I find this journal.  I remember it, my favorite teacher gave it to me when I graduated high school, telling me to use it to chart the course of my dreams.  Inside there are a bunch of pages torn out (this I don't remember) and one single page filled, dated July 27, 2003.  It says:
I was 18 years old when I first started writing in this book, only nine years, but I feel like I have lived a lifetime since then.  Mrs. H gave me this book to write down my dreams and here they are:
to be happy, to be true to myself, to be good to others, to learn when its right to be selfish and when to be selfless, to find that path, to know more each day, to sleep peacefully, to know my family more, to be someone's guide, to share what I know, to love and be loved without reservation, to believe in myself, to learn to see the good in me.

Then I concluded:  All this has just been prologue.  Chapter One begins NOW...

I laugh at how much I have changed, and how much is still the same.  I know myself much more now, or at least have the tools of introspection to help me understand myself.  I believe in myself, and my ability to make my life what I want it to be. And I am to true to myself, in every choice I make.  No compromises.  I accomplished so much in Chapter One.  Bring on Chapter Two.  It begins NOW.

Klimt

I think I finally understand why I love Klimt so much.  These paintings look like my dreams on canvas.  Warmth, passion, color, peace.  Abstract and real  at the same time.

"The Kiss"

"Water Serpents II (detail)" "Water Serpents II"

I am enraptured by these paintings.

a little corner of heaven

Take a look:
Neil Gaiman's Personal Library

Thoughts: 
1. This is totally gorgeous.
2. I am oddly turned on by it.
3. I wonder if he needs someone to catalogue it all. And would he prefer Dewey Decimal or Library of Congress?
4. If I had a personal library like this, would I ever come out again?

Presidential Thoughts on my First Day of School

I'm a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it.
-Thomas Jefferson


The best thing about the future is that it only comes one day at a time.
-Abraham Lincoln


Work hard, but remember to take everything in one day at a time.

EW Fall Movie Preview

FINALLY got to sit down with last week's EW, which happened to be one of my favorite yearly issues: the Fall Movie Preview.  So much to look forward to, let's see:

1. New Moon:  Because, yes, I am female, yes, I loved the story, and yes, these vampires and werewolves are hot.  So, maybe I am too old for this, and maybe the writing in the books left a lot to be desired.  And?  Maybe I'll forgo the midnight screening to avoid the prepubescent screeches of desire.  Yeah, good plan.
2. Coco Before Chanel  I have loved Audrey Tatou since Amelie.  Early overseas reviews hail this as one of her best performances yet.

3. Shutter Island  I have been in a love hate relationship with Martin Scorsese for the last decade.  I hated Bringing Out the Dead and The Gangs of New York, the latter being his first film with his now frequent collaborator, Leonardo Di Caprio.  I loved The Aviator and The Departed, both of course, starring Di Caprio.  Shutter Island is the latest from this duo and Di Caprio has been bringing his A game to every role I have seen him in since Catch Me if You Can, so if the trend continues, I should really enjoy this one as well.

4. New York, I Love You Paris, Je T'aime was all at once an endearing, heartbreaking, sweet, love letter to Paris.  New York, I Love You will follow the same pattern as its predecessor, featuring a series of five minute vignettes on love, in all its forms, with the city that never sleeps as its backdrop.  The film has a fantastic cast: Natalie Portman, Julie Christie, Chris Cooper, Andy Garcia, Shia La Boeuf, Ethan Hawke, Robin Wright Penn, Christina Ricci, Orlando Bloom, Justin Bartha, and Bradley Cooper, among others.

5. Whip It Drew Barrymore's directorial debut.  Ellen Page.  Roller Derbies.  How could I NOT want to see this?

6. The Box Trailer looks totally weird, but, well so did Donnie Darko, and look how that turned out.  Besides, I would watch James Marden read the phonebook.

7.The Lovely Bones  This is one of those instances that I had absolutely no inkling or desire to watch this film. It was not even on my radar. Until I saw the trailer.  I was completely enthralled by the stunnigly beautiful afterlife that Peter Jackson has created for his protaganist.  Even the image used on the film's webpage has left me wanting more.  And now, I can't wait.

8. Sherlock Holmes Guy Ritchie started with a stroke of sheer genius, taking the common expectation of who Holmes and Watson are, and turned it on its end, casting two most unexpected actors in the roles, Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law.  The film promises to be a gritty, raw interpretation of the literary classic.  I like it.
9. Avatar  I cannot possibly imagine how this film will ever live up to all the hype that James Cameron has built up around it.  I must say, the new trailer has left me vastly underwhelmed.  How it turns out shall remain to be seen.  Nevertheless, this is a film everyone will be talking about, and I want to be part of the conversation.

The 40 Most Handsome Hollywood Men (Right Now) - Premiere.com

The 40 Most Handsome Hollywood Men (Right Now) - Premiere.com

Posted using ShareThis

Very nice well-rounded list.  Particular favorites:  Hugh Jackman, James Marsden, Chris Pine, Leonardo DiCaprio, Eric Bana, Gael Garcia Bernal, Daniel Craig, Ryan Gosling.  All lovely, to be sure!! :-)

25 Things About Me

There is thing, running rampant all over facebook, I finally relented and made a list too.  So here it is, 25 totally random things about me:


1) I love baby tushies. Oh, and babies should smell like violetas.

2) I have a detailed map in my mind of every major South Florida mall. A similar map exists in my mind of the entire Walt Disney World Resort.

3) I find the Wonder Pets extremely annoying.

4) I don't like Wuthering Heights or Jane Eyre, why do I feel like I should?

5) When I ponder the enormity of the universe, I feel really really insignificant.

6) I recently realized that I use the word ginormous a lot, and its not even a real word.

7) I like Dairy Queen cakes better than Carvel, but I like Cold Stone cakes better than Dairy Queen. On the subject of food, I hate chocoloate ice cream, watermelon, and celery. Mixed together or individually. I love any dish involving bananas and caramel.

8) I take a strange delight in new office supplies. I LOVE re-stocking the supply closet.

9) I have what is probably an unhealthy obsession with beauty products, perfumes, lotions, and potions. Sephora is a little piece of heaven on earth to me. My favorites right now are Viva La Juicy, Origins Modern Friction, Bliss Steep Clean Cleansing Milk, Bliss Lemon and Sage Body Butter and Murad skin perfecting lotion. I would probably buy anything Caudalie makes, if it wouldn't slowly bankrupt me.

10) If my shower isn't one step short of scalding me, I don't feel clean. I often come out of the shower red as a tomato and slightly light headed.

11) I am ridiculously afraid of frogs. Like screaming, irrational, jump on furniture kind of scared. And I don't care what anyone tells me, I KNOW they all shoot venom.

12) I really admire artists, musicians and actors, and I wish I could be creative that way.

13) If nothing else mattered, I would live in Hawaii.

14) I don't like condescending people, and I hate being told what to do.

15) If I had it to do all over again, I would not become a lawyer. I would also not have hurried to finish undergrad in three years. What was I thinking? I have no idea now why I wanted to grow up so fast.

16) I sing in the shower and pretend I have just won American Idol.

17) I love bad boys gone good. Han Solo, Sawyer, Starbuck. Well, she is as bad ass as any boy out there, so she counts. I think geeks are hot too. Yeah, I am a big conundrum

18) I love Red Carpet events, the Golden Globes, SAG awards, Emmys, Oscars, movie premieres, and so on. I can look at Red Carpet dresses from the last 20 years and usually identify the star and designer without hesitation.

19) I am wary of organized religion. It sure seems to have caused a lot of heartache.

20) I bruise really easily.

21) I hold grudges, please don't cross me, it takes me a while to get over it.

22) I am really afraid of heights. You will never find me jumping off a perfectly good airplane.

23) Why is this turning into a phobias list? I am afraid of plane crashes. but not in the normal way. I am afraid that a plane is going to fall out of the sky on my head. I hate driving by that section of the palmetto by the airport.

24) I think LOST will eventually be regarded as one the best television shows in history. If you haven't been watching, you are seriously missing out.

25) I am a dancing fool (when no one is watching).

Pee Pee in the Potty

Ben went pee pee in the potty today. Finally.

Why does it feel weird that pee pee in the potty makes me so happy?

My Precious

Iphone + asphalt = SAD BIANCA

 

Apple Store + $200= BIANCA IS WHOLE ONCE MORE